NOT A REAL OBITUARY - SCHOOL PROJECT

Carla Artopiades, the woman who discovered the cure for cancer, died in her sleep peacefully on Tuesday morning in her sleep. She was 107 years old.

Carla was in outstanding health and exercised daily. She was also very big on vitamins. After a long productive life, her heart simply gave out.

"She was the smartest person I ever met," said her neighbor, Thomas Mandolia. "She never gave ip and had a mind like a steel trap. I will never forget the day she gave my wife the injection that cured her of cancer. What a great woman."

Carla Artopiades was born into a Catholic family and was raised in Whitestone, Queens. She went to Saint Francis Preparatory School and went on to Saint John's University to get her degree in Radiology and Pharmacy.

Carla Artopiades spent many years of her life trying to find a cure for cancer. At the same time, she had a husband and raised three kids, and had a regular life. Finally, at the age of sixty in 2053, she put together a cure for cancer made out of a mixture of many vitamins, herbal supplements, and an element she invented called Carlium.


"She has saved millions of lives in less than fifty years. Without her, a lot of people would be dead," says long time business partner, Nicole Catalanello. Artopiades is survived by three children, nine grandchildren, and six great-grandchildren. Her husband died ten years ago, a couple of months after they celebrated their seventieth wedding anniversary.

Services will be held at Holy Trinity Roman Catholic Church, the church Carla was baptized in and attended her whole life.

Advertisement Dissection and Analysis

This advertisement is for Snackwell's 130 Calorie Packs. The ad says "Be Bad, Snack Well" and has a picture of a girl standing on top of a guy. This ad is taking place in the present. The girl is wearing a short shirt and her underwear and the guy is wearing underwear. However, he is covered by lettering so he could potentially not even be wearing underwear. They look as if they are having a really fun time. In this advertisement, there is a bed, pillows, and a window overlooking apartment buildings, suggesting that they are living in a loft in a city. They are both smiling and laughing. These facial expressions suggest that the 130 calorie packs will keep you happy and in good shape. It seems that the young couple may be boyfriend and girlfriend or maybe just friends with benefits. The thing most interesting about this advertisement is that although it is supposed to be selling a healthy snack, the people in the picture are not even eating the 130 calorie packs. It seems like the picture is more at a modeling photo shoot.

English Assignment #1

I always wanted a dog since I was a little girl. Every year on my Christmas and 
birthday list, a dog would be on the top of the list. We could never get one 
because my mom had cancer and her doctor said her immune system was too weak and 
they did not want her to catch something from a dog.

At the end of my freshman year of high school, my friend gave me a cold which 
turned into bronchitis which I passed on to my mother.  We were both at the 
doctor and afterwards we went into the dog store. We always would go in to look 
but never got one. For some reason, my mom asked to hold a little white puppy. 
The woman took the dog out of his pen and the dog went crazy and ran around the 
whole store, happy to be taken out. After about five minutes of running around, 
he got tired and stopped. My mom picked him up and he fell asleep right in her 
arms. At this moment, my mother felt an instant connection.

I, however, was not crazy about this dog because I had always wanted a Yorkshire 
Terrier because I thought they were the cutest dogs. The next day we went back 
and I got to see him and hold him for myself and I realized what a special dog 
he was. He let me hold him like he was a human baby. A day later, we took him 
home. He helped me through a very hard time in my life and became the one thing 
that could make me happy when I was feeling the worst.